In the beginning of the year, my parents told me that I should follow my dreams, choose my own path and enjoy what I do.... I had trouble trying to find what I enjoy and want to do as a career but I eventually found something that I'm interested in. Now, they tell me that they won't allow me to do what I want to do. If that sounded confusing to you, it basically went like this..
parents: do what you like to do! enjoy it! do something you're passionate about!
maggie: I don't know what I want to do
parents: you could do engineer if you like it, or a lawyer
maggie: okay I'll do engineer
months later
parents: you should really do something you're interested in, so you can succeed in that field.
maggie: okay I think health science is pretty cool and I want to help
parents: no we think health science is bad because you'll put in so much effort, then find yourself long way down the med road and lose your freedom. Instead, we think engineering is better for you and your future.
maggie: okay I'll do engineer
parents: what are you interested in the engineering field
maggie: software or mechanical I guess
parents: no that's a bad choice I know some software engineers who regret becoming one and are now teachers. You need to rethink your choices. Software engineering is shit (yep they said that in mando)
oh did I really have a choice all along?
I'm sure many of you out there have experienced these kind of conversations or the short version of that.
parents: you will be doctor
you: ok
There goes parents killing off my interest in anything. Why not just tell me what to do instead of criticising my choices. Now I'm not even interested in anything really. I know that they're trying to help me but are they just trying to make me live the life they want? Are they trying to relive their own dreams through me? They could be just concerned about whether or not I can get a job and live independently in the future but I'm not sure if they've ever considered if I'll lose interest in even doing the job and living the life I was told to live. Every time I've tried to stand up for my beliefs, they'll just pull out examples of where people regret doing the course/career they've chosen. They'll say, "well I don't like my job either, but it's my job and I have to live off doing this job that I don't like at all". Somehow, I just don't have any adults around me that actually enjoy their jobs and can stand up for it. To be honest, I'll rather live a life that I don't regret living than to live a life that is bounded by restrictions and full of things I have absolutely no interest in. Well not all of us get the choice to do whatever we like so boo hoo, suck it up.
I've been tricked into thinking I could do what I enjoy.
GGWP.